Tired

Okay,

I am the firm believer that every straight girl should have a gay guy for a friend. The problem is when said gay guy can't come over until 930 at night because he works night, has a boyfriend who refuses to meet his "straight" friends, and hasn't been over in months.

So Mischa, Ki, and I spent most of the night up, talking and catching up. I'm glad that he has finally embraced who he was and was comfortable enough to come out of the closet. I decided that if he could tell his "little secret" then I could tell him about us being a threesome in every sense of the word. I think he might be a little weirded out though... just wasn't comfortable seeing Mischa and I affectionate other than the simple stuff-the cordial stuff.

Hmm, more about this after I've gotten some sleep. I hate dealing with crappy freshmen!

What to call

the other significant other in your life? A blog that I read frequently, just asked this question and I've been pondering it ever since. I don't call him anything special and usually just refer to him as a friend. I wonder if this makes me a cop out. Am I not being true to the relationship? Am I purposefully leading others on in order to avoid the looks, questions, etc?

I'm not really sure -- why I don't have a specific reference point? Is it because technically the relationship is not sanctioned by "the church" and the government? Is it because technically, in the eyes of the government, it is considered adultery? And adultery is still an illegal act in many states. Or is it because I don't have the need to qualify and quantify the relationship?

I think the word "lover" is too much a throw back to the whole "Harlequin" romance novel of the week--trite and overused. I can't really say "husband" because technically, no ceremony--no piece of paper--no sanction. I don't like significant other because well, I don't like it. I mean, we all have significant others in our lives. A boss is a significant other, as well as friends and extended family. What defines the term "significant?" And "friend with benefits" just annoys me... I guess most of the terms annoy me. Mischa is just Mischa. Yes, we sleep together at times. Yes, we've had some raunchy, mindblowing, rooting around sex. Most of the time though, we talk. And we laugh. And we don't have to talk unless we want to. We rarely fight and he tries to make me happy. FWIW, so does Jay... but he's gone frequently for work so we have happiness in spurts rather than the everyday stuff like making sure my tires have enough air and making dinner sort of banality.

Hmmm, guess I will have to think about this some more...

You Are 100% Feminist

You are a total feminist. This doesn't mean you're a man hater (in fact, you may be a man). You just think that men and women should be treated equally. It's a simple idea but somehow complicated for the world to put into action.

Are You a Feminist?

UGH

The mother in law arrived today. Did I get any notice??? NOPE! So I had less than an hour to get the house cleaned and dinner ready. I am so thankful that she doesn't realize the extent of the relationship with Mischa. I just can't believe that I have to put up with her pedantic behavior until Sunday... I thought I was going to have a lazy weekend before I went through my week of training at the new job!!!!!

Boring, work related stuff

So this morning, I get into my spiffy new "office" (cubicle farm), sit down at the sort of new computer and fire it up. The secretary for our suite of cubes comes over to ask me a question: Do I know how to use Outlook because she is now bouncing stuff from her email. Forty five minutes later, I have set up her outlook to reroute all the emails from staff to appropriate folders, all the emails from her family into a separate folder, etc.

I really should be working on stuff for my classes. I should be doing something else than posting on a blog. More later then...

Initial Posts

I'm going to try this blogging thing that all the "cool kids" are doing.

Me: Well, I am an anthropologist and am happily married to the man of my dreams, even if some of those dreams are not the typical of what is deemed a happy life. I also have a second man in my life-which might be shocking to most but we're happy with our lives, commingled as they are.

The other characters in the play are Jay, the official, legal type husband. He's a translator and is frequently gone. And Mischa, who I guess I could refer to as the second, unofficial husband. Obviously, there is no legality to this relationship but when a majority of my friends cannot wed the person they choose, I don't see where I have any complaints.

I'll try and post more adding this page to the poly email list I have as well as the poly blogs I read. I might even try to post some non-poly stuff like my upcoming trip to see Lucy in October.

Sarai