What to call

the other significant other in your life? A blog that I read frequently, just asked this question and I've been pondering it ever since. I don't call him anything special and usually just refer to him as a friend. I wonder if this makes me a cop out. Am I not being true to the relationship? Am I purposefully leading others on in order to avoid the looks, questions, etc?

I'm not really sure -- why I don't have a specific reference point? Is it because technically the relationship is not sanctioned by "the church" and the government? Is it because technically, in the eyes of the government, it is considered adultery? And adultery is still an illegal act in many states. Or is it because I don't have the need to qualify and quantify the relationship?

I think the word "lover" is too much a throw back to the whole "Harlequin" romance novel of the week--trite and overused. I can't really say "husband" because technically, no ceremony--no piece of paper--no sanction. I don't like significant other because well, I don't like it. I mean, we all have significant others in our lives. A boss is a significant other, as well as friends and extended family. What defines the term "significant?" And "friend with benefits" just annoys me... I guess most of the terms annoy me. Mischa is just Mischa. Yes, we sleep together at times. Yes, we've had some raunchy, mindblowing, rooting around sex. Most of the time though, we talk. And we laugh. And we don't have to talk unless we want to. We rarely fight and he tries to make me happy. FWIW, so does Jay... but he's gone frequently for work so we have happiness in spurts rather than the everyday stuff like making sure my tires have enough air and making dinner sort of banality.

Hmmm, guess I will have to think about this some more...